Friday, 23 October 2009

Abby Normal

The Boss : "Abbydabby?"

Here's me : "Abu Dhabi?"

The Boss : "No, dabs?"

Here's me : "...oh for fuck's sake. What?"

The Boss : "Have we any?"

Here's me : "Wha?"

The Boss : "For the phone."

Here's me : "Wha?"

The Boss : "Have we any phone wipes?"

Here's me : "Seriously. What is 'abbydabby'? And how does this relate to phone wipes?"

The Boss : "I've sneezed on my phone and I need some wee... abbydabby... thingy... phone wipes. I couldn't remember the word."


  1. I just discovered your site and have been reading back through some of your older posts. In the comments of one there was someone who mentioned dysphasia. With all her trouble pronouncing, recalling, and then making up her own words, it sounds like she really is suffering from that. I almost feel bad for her as she clearly has many problems. Almost. You've got so much more patience than I.

    I'm going to keep a watch for updates on your blog in the hopes that you don't end up cracking. Also, to find out if she is or isn't planning something dark and crazy.

  2. Stay strong... and sane!

  3. Dude, have you ever asked her if she... yknow... has any prior conditions or anything? Because I've gone back and read your entire blog and man, there's something not right here. It's like she doesn't even realize what she's doing. Have you ever asked HR or someone? Her superior? Because it sounds like she does this over the phone too, and if she's been in shipping for 27 years someone's bound to know.

    And does she EVER string some english together to be able to perform tasks at least adequately? Does she ever fuck up while writing too, and not notice? Or is her stuff all covered in scribble-outs?

    Seriously, I gotta know. She seems too unreal to be real.

    Hold strong partner, from a fellow shipping man (but in Australia, and warehouse manager, not desk jockey).

  4. It's crossed my mind, a number of times, but I'm pretty sure that on the conversation end of things it's just a form of laziness.* It's magnified I guess because there are only the two of us here; if it was a larger office, it would just be that crazy person that exists in every office that you tend to avoid - unfortunately avoiding her is not possible.

    Adam, on the writing front - it's a bit crazy too, as are various other habits, and some entries related to this will be following soon I guess!

    * In respect of being a total paranoid mentalist though, I have no explanation or theories at all, apart from thinking she might be receiving signals from an alien planet.

    Greetings folks and thank you for your words of support!

  5. Oh, also -
    on the HR thing - yeah, there are people I could talk to, but this is the eternal conundrum here - how do I go about such a thing without as a result making the situation in here completely unlivable? It's a Catch-22 type scenario. Or maybe I'm just a lazy masochist, who knows...