Wednesday, 1 April 2009

We Have A Slight Reactor Leak

I am very tired and quite hungover today. The following began when I walked back into the office just now, after the all-to-few minutes of sanity to be found in standing outside smoking a cigarette. The following begins just as I take my seat, with, as ever, no explanation or apparent cause.

The Boss : "Breaker of contractor... James Whiteman."

Here's me : "Wha?"

The Boss : "Breaker contractor."

Here's me : "Wha?"

The Boss : "Contract breaker."

Here's me : "Wha?"

The Boss : "James Whiteman. Deepthroat."

Here's me : "Deepthroat?"

The Boss : "Deeprose. James Deeprose."

Here's me : "Wha? Deeprose? Contract? Wha?"

The Boss : "Breaker. No, stone-crusher. Contracts. No, tracks. Two tracks. Tracks. Tracks...
... four tracks. Can't."

Here's me : "-"

The Boss : "I was trying to estimate how many I could fit in a container."

Here's me : "No really, seriously, what the fuck are you talking about?"

The Boss : "There was a thing on Radio One this morning about free maps."

Here's me : "Wha?"

The Boss : "It was a phone-in thing. About half price tracks. Fuel. Half-price fuel. They all went for it. Stupid English."

Here's me : "uh... yeah?"

The Boss : "You've no way of knowing what the serial number on that is, because he could be mixing and matching parts. That... track....
..."April Fuel's Day", and none of them got it"

I have not one single fucking clue about any of this, folks.

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